If I would have left at the time a friend suggested I would be missing out on a wonderful friendship. – Jessica L Murray
Genre: Relationship & Dating Advice
Dating and relationships are fun but they’re certainly not easy. There’s a lot of guess work in the beginning and it gets more complex as two people try to fit their lives perfectly in sync with each other.
Jessica Lee Murray is looking to help us make sense of all of it with her new book A Normal Relationship Does Not Exist which is the first in a series of relationship books she intends to release.
We sat down with Jessica for a quick chat about her new book, her journey as a first time writer and her own dating and relationship experience including the worst advice she’s received.
What are the last three books you read?
Who is your favorite author?
I can say, without hesitation, my favorite author will always be Maya Angelou. Aside from that moment I had as a child reading “Still I Rise”, I genuinely enjoy her writing from her poems to her autobiographies. Reading her work I just always felt this weird connection like I personally know her. As a writer I can only hope I can make that connection with my audience one day.
What inspired you to become a writer?
When I first read Maya Angelou’s “Still I Rise” I remember my breath being taken away. Of course, I read many books before I got to that poem but, there was something so beautiful and poignant about that poem that I had to re-read it over and over again.
Each time I read it, I felt something new and smiled as I read. I wanted to bring people the pleasure Dr. Angelou brought me at that very moment. Actually, the pleasure she still brings me to this very day. I knew I wanted to write from that very moment. I didn’t know about what, I wasn’t even a teen at the time but I just wanted to write.
Describe your new book “A Normal Relationship Does Not Exist” in 30 words or less:
I like to tell people to think of A Normal Relationship Does Not Exist as a guide to their new or current relationship. Usually we females tend to turn to other friends to vent and seek answers about our relationship problems. It’s good to have a friend to vent too but seek DETAILED answers, which you will get from my book.
Dealing with love is tough. Dealing with love as a minority is even tougher.
Why did you decide to write a relationship book?
I noticed every time my girlfriends and I hung out we would typically talk about our relationship problems. Whatever the topic was I would go home and write in my journal. Then my journals turned into articles and I started writing for Newspitter’s Relationship Wednesday section. The feedback was great and before I knew it I was publishing my first book.
What will people get from this book that they may not get from other ‘relationship advice’ books?
Usually relationship advice books are written by popular entertainers, doctors and people who have been married for a long period of time. I wanted something for my age group, problems that we deal with now in our culture and, most importantly, for my readers to feel that someone is going through the same exact thing they are at this very moment.
I am single, unmarried and no children and have been in the dating scene for quite some time. Sad to say the dating scene is one big playing field, one big game and hopefully my book will help young people navigate it with ease.
What was the worst dating or relationship advice you received?
Too often when we vent about our relationship problems to our friends, family or colleagues I feel that the default answer is always; “You should just leave him”. If we all left when the “honeymoon” phase is over we would all be sad and lonely because there is no perfect, or how I like to say “normal” relationship.
I think the worst dating advice I have ever received has been the automatic “you should leave him” with only hearing thirty seconds of our three year story. We did end up breaking up some time later but remain good friends to this day. If I would have left at the time a friend suggested I would be missing out on a wonderful friendship.
What are your goals as a writer?
This is my first book; however, I am currently working on my second book at the moment. I plan to keep A Normal Relationship Does Not Exist as the theme so expect a series of books. The book I am working on now is A Normal Relationship Does Not Exist: Doing It Wrong. This book will be more personal and actually feature some of my friends (but shhh they don’t know yet lol.)
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