Stay Connected with Sarita Lynn
Many of us know a family or friend with a substance abuse problem or alcohol dependence. We did with those people in different ways. More times than not we accept it and even somewhat enable them by either drinking or doing drugs with them or giving them money knowing they’ll use it for there addiction. At what point do you become a
Author Sarita Lynn knows from experience what it was like to be an enabler for her brother and she’s sharing it in her new book “The Quandary: Feeling Responsible for What’s Not Mine“.
We took a moment to speak with Sarita for our author spotlight series and learned about the book as well as 5 warning signs that you might be an enabler. If you feel that you are an enabler or know someone who is then I recommend this book. You can purchase “The Quandary: Feeling Responsible for What’s Not Mine” at www.skiepublishing.com
What inspired you to become a writer?
Unfortunately, my desire to write came through the pain of my brother, George, dying from a drug overdose and the many years I’ve enabled my relationships. Writing The Quandary was one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done.
Life is hard enough going through it once, but when you must relive many painful decisions you’ve made requires an inner strength stronger than you. In my book I speak transparently about the many trials I’ve had to overcome in life such as growing up with an alcoholic father, being divorced, brother died of a drug overdose, my father dying of cancer, foreclosure, being in an abusive relationship and trying to be everything to everyone. I decided to take the pain of my lessons to write about it, so I can help others live free from being an enabler.
Describe your book in 30 words or less
It’s an interactive book that teaches you the warning signs of being an enabler, how to start holding others accountable for their decisions and focus on living your best life.
Why should we read it?
I would encourage anyone to read The Quandary…if you have ever made decisions to appease others looking for approval, feel as if it’s your responsibility to save the world, or think nothing will get done unless you do it. The Quandary is a self-help book to guide you through your own personal journal to identify the root causes of why you enable others, create an action plan for change, and learn how to make yourself a priority without feeling guilty.
What are some of the warning signs of being an enabler?
• Saying yes just to appease others
• Always bailing others out of trouble
• Not being patient to allow them to confront the issue on their own
• Getting mad when they don’t take your advice
• Doing for others what they should be doing for themselves
Do you have any suggestions or resources on how people could respond if they are an enabler?
• Try not to respond immediately but allow yourself time to see the bigger issue
• Remove your emotions out the equation
• Weigh the cost of the decision you will make
• Read the Support and Resources sections found in The Quandary book